I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
I need a burrito and a hug.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
