Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
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