we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
