So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
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