i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Randomize
