he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Randomize
