Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
