If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize
