party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Randomize
