Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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