is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
