i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize