oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
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