I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
Randomize
