did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
