two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Randomize