Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize