No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
