Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
