you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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