It's Friday. Sex?
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
