i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
