day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
