i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
How does one acquire holy water?
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
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