We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
