but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Randomize
