He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
