so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
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