Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Randomize
