Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I queefed so loud it echoed.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize