It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Randomize
