I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize
