The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
