It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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