look no pants
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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