I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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