That's when you crack a 10am beer
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Randomize
