I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
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