Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
