Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
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