Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize
