its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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