hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
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