so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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