her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize
