To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
