did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
