living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
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