ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
It's blow job season.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
All I want is dick and wine.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Randomize
