I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
