I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
she peed on how many people?
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
